The Meaning of Immortality

A lot of people have been asking about the meaning behind this statue. Let me start out by saying that this statue doesn't have a concrete meaning. There are layers upon layers in there, starting with Michael's desire to help humanity understand the sacrifices that women make regarding decisions having to do with childbirth. Especially, he once said, to help men understand.

We know that men will never really understand it because they've never experienced it. They can't have babies, or a miscarriage, or be barren (infertile, maybe, and we have to be sympathetic to that too). During my pregnancies I was extremely sick most of the time. I threw up a lot, I had to have an IV once, and my last pregnancy left me incredibly uncomfortable and nursing a hiatal hernia.

And what happens after that? Motherhood isn't all joyful, delightful babies, but a lot of crying and colic and hunger and biting and nursing and pain and giving up your body for quite a while at the demands of that tiny little thing. Sometimes it doesn't happen. We don't get pregnant, or we lose a pregnancy, and that's so hard to understand if you haven't experienced it yourself. But it doesn't have to be completely out of reach. Often making an effort to understand makes all the difference in the world.

But more than that, Immortality is about the legacy we leave our posterity. I teach my kids everything I can because I want them to carry on some of the knowledge and experience I have. My husband creates art so that it will influence people for years to come. We create experiences for children so that they can pass down our legacy.

It's one of the reasons women often want to have a girl, or that men often want to father a boy. It doesn't really matter in the end, because as women we can teach our boys how important it is to get along with females, to enjoy the same things that bring happiness in life, and to respect women. And fathers can teach their girls how to respect males as well, and how to do things that they both might enjoy. I mean, my dad taught me how to fish when I was four. I loved it.

Immortality is hope. It's for all of us. Please join us at https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/945510695/immortality-monument-for-alta-view-hospital. And share on your favorite social media network. Only a few more days!

Thanks so much! From us, Amanda and Michael Hall.

Sharing With The World

On August 5, 2015, many of us watched as the video of Sam and Nia Rader took the internet by storm. Sam "stole" his wife's urine, performed a pregnancy test, and told her that she was pregnant. How often does the husband know beforehand? It was awesome, really, that he was brave and willing to do that.

Courtesy of KSL.com

Three days later they posted another video of their heartbreaking miscarriage announcement. Nia said that she had had no idea that women felt that way after a miscarriage. She said, "I just feel empty." I know because I've been there. And yet, there are many things I haven't experienced. I know several women who have adopted, women who have only a few children but wanted more and weren't able to, and women whose health was at risk who weren't able to try or even qualify for adoption.

Almost looks like a real person, doesn't it?

Thanks to the eruption of social media over the past decade, we can share in personal moments with people we've never met and connect with them in ways we never thought possible. It's the reason art is so important. It's one of the things that connects us. We're all people. We all know women, whether we are one or not. We understand that it's important to respect each other, whether we do or not. And we have all lost love and have experienced grief and despair.

But we've also experienced hope and joy. We counter our bad experiences with good. Hope in the creation of new life. Joy in the expansion of a family. Good in the people around us that we love, our family and friends. When we are grieving we need the understanding of others, and when we know someone who is grieving it is our job to be the understanding one. When we are happy we want others to be happy with us, and when others are happy we can join with them in celebrating.

Immortality Monument, by Michael Aaron Hall

Join us at https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/945510695/immortality-monument-for-alta-view-hospital. Every little bit helps!

Thoughts on Public Art and the Nature of Pornography

I thought this was a good place to voice my opinion on something. There is a reason my husband and I are devoted to public art. We want to make quality - especially figurative - sculpture with classical elements available to everyone. Excuse me; not just sculpture but all worthwhile paintings and other media. This type of art is the opposite of porn.

What's that? You say that art is often porn in disguise? Yep, I've heard that. And yes, "art" can cross over the line. That's where I believe that a piece of work ceases to be a piece of true art. Growing up we were taught not to walk around naked, don't even look at somebody else who's naked, and for heaven's sake even turn your eyes in the locker room so you don't accidentally see someone naked. Who is the same sex you are.

Elizabeth Smart, victim of kidnapping

Body shaming is addressed so eloquently by Elizabeth Smart. We have been taught all our lives that if we cross certain lines (such as having sex or, gasp, seeing someone else naked) that we are damaged. Ms. Smart said,
        "I had a teacher who was talking about abstinence, she said, 'Imagine you're a stick of gum and when you engage in sex, that's like getting chewed, and if you do that lots of times, you're going to become an old piece of gum, and who's going to want you after that?" (Courtesy The Guardian)

Imagine being in her position, where this phrase goes through her head and she's being raped over and over again. Of course she wasn't damaged. She was the victim of a hateful crime that has now come out to tell people to stop it, to change our pattern of thinking.

That's what I'm here for too. My expressed opinions here are not about rape, but they are about trying to change the way we think. What do you think is going to happen when you pass Victoria Secret and you put your hand over your young boy's curious eyes? He's going to want to know what he missed later. We often hide truth thinking that we are protecting are children when in fact we are muddling it. If he sees it, maybe he'll ask you a question like, "What is that woman doing in her underwear?" To which you can truthfully respond, "It's an ad for an underwear store." What if the conversation goes further? Maybe he asks, "It makes me feel weird." To which you might answer, "It's too much, isn't it? Remember that women aren't meant to be put on ads that make you uncomfortable. They're meant to be respected and loved." You could go into all kinds of conversations from there.

Venus de Milo

We sometimes view Victoria Secret ads as that crossed-line that is a bit pornographic. It can be, make no mistake about it. When I talk to my kids about pornography, however, I often allow them to view photos of classical statues of both men and women in the nude. Then I ask them to describe it and if they like it. Then I ask them how it makes them feel. At first, my oldest son was embarrassed to be looking at statues of nude people. I explained that there is a beauty to classical art that is much like the respect doctors show to their patients. I was part of a lab that worked with cadavers once and we were taught that these were real people and we needed to show respect for them. Statues may not be real people, but they are designed to communicate messages or stories with real people. We can relate to art in a very similar way that we can relate to each other.

The Immortality Monument

The Immortality Monument sends a message. It teaches all of us to respect women and the sacrifices they make for us. As women, we bring children into the world. Even if we aren't able to, we help raise those around us, whether through adoption, being an aunt or friend, or a good neighbor. We deserve to be respected, and we can help teach others that this type of art expresses a story that demands respect and seeks to be understood.

Immortality Monument, Alta View Women's Center

We are up and running again!

Promoting myself isn’t something that I’ve ever been comfortable doing, and even though this isn’t entirely about me, in a small way it is. I’m promoting something beautiful, thought provoking and life changing, and it has to do with all women.

 

Immortality is a statue that Michael Aaron Hall created while exploring the decisions women make regarding childbirth. This is a subject I feel strongly about, especially since I’ve experienced so many different emotions regarding pregnancy, childbirth, and loss.

From everything I’d been told growing up, pregnancy was a magical feeling, wonderful and precious. I didn’t understand the dark side of pregnancy; the throwing up, the constant ache, and the incredible depression you may get postpartum.

At eight and a half months pregnant I was swollen and huge and I didn’t feel pretty at all. I had morning sickness with all five of my pregnancies, one so bad that I had to go to the hospital to be re-hydrated. My last pregnancy was uncomfortable almost all of the time. I felt ugly and enormous, and yet, I don’t really want to be finished. I would like another child. It's almost destroyed me as I try to figure out what to do.

 

I lost two pregnancies between my second and third child. It was hard. It was difficult. And for one of them I wasn’t at home when it happened. I felt alone and so unexpectedly sad that I was afraid for myself. I didn’t think my odds of miscarriage were very good since my own mother never had one, but I dealt with two of them. Do you really think I was ready to jump into pregnancy again after miscarrying a second time?

Art was one of the best therapies I had. I’m lucky to be married to an artist. I would sit and watch my husband create these beautiful figures, and somehow that helped me get through my grief. It gave me hope for myself and others, and I want to share the empathy and compassion this sculpture has to offer.

What are we, as women, facing in today’s pressured world? Do we have time for children? Will we be able tot adopt if we want to? Are we going to be able to support them once they get here? There are so many factors now, things I never thought about or took into consideration before getting pregnant with my first child. And although things usually seem to work out in the end, there’s always that nagging fear that they won’t.

There are different reasons we want or don’t want to have children. I have a strong relationship with my husband, and I know that when we have a child that we are both in it together. We know what it takes – the restless nights, the constant diaper changes, and the sacrifice of most of our free time. We may not understand what others are going through in their lives and circumstances, but this is our opportunity to try.

 

Immortality will be a life-size sculpture in bronze. The first step in this process is to get the piece created. We are looking at several different places that would be a possible home for the sculpture. Personally I would like to see it at a hospital or women’s center. If you have any thoughts or ideas about the statue itself or where you would like to see something like this located, share them with us.

Thank you for stopping by and reading, and if you feel as impassioned by this as I do, feel free to share our link at https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/945510695/immortality-monument-for-alta-view-hospital.

For more information about the artist, please visit www.michaelaaronhall.com
  

A New Life

A quick blurb about Immortality...

When I think of this statue, I think of new life. Not just human life, but all life. And rebirth, too. Isn't it nice sometimes to be able to go to bed knowing you'll be able to start over in the morning? I love a new day. A new time. A new thing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GeuVBc76jas&feature=player_detailpage

Like this amazing song (click on youtube link above), one I still love from my younger days, which speaks to younger generations and their ability to make the world better than we did. We expect great things of the younger generation because we know what they are capable of, that they can do great and amazing things if they work hard and hang in there.

Oh, come on. You knew that pic was coming.
I am realizing more and more that the upcoming generation is much smarter, more excited, and more talented that I will ever be. I can humble myself to admit that. I am grateful for my kids and the lessons they teach me, and for other women in my life and the ways they've helped me. I'm grateful to a husband for doing everything in his power to make me happy, and I am grateful for my (so far) good health.

Attitude of Grattitude

A toast, to a new day.
To the generation of my sons, who are the new day.
And to the people who helped make it better.

One More Time

One the subject of not giving up.
Because I want to. But lately I have realized that I've let a lot of negativity into my life. Too much. I've become too self-degrading and too wrapped up in what a terrible failure I am. I don't know why. Yesterday, I decided to make a change.

This will be me. I have lots of things to improve on, but since this blog is dedicated to the Immortality statue, I'm going to talk about not losing hope that I can have more kids.

I just turned 35. You know, the age when doctors are now like, "You need to be more careful when you're pregnant," and a whole lot of other risks go up. I really do want another child. It just so happens that I'm not at a good place for that yet. It's a constant battle in my head. Part of me wants to throw caution to the wind and just go for it. The other is screaming, "What are you thinking?"

 

This is me on a good day, when I'm not kicking my mattress and cursing in the privacy of my bedroom. Besides, what if I get pregnant and I miscarry? I've had that problem twice already. Do I really want to put my body through that again? Through the morning sickness and discomfort and stretching and misshapen blobbiness?

 

The answer is, I do. I would go through that again. I thought about this while dropping my youngest off at school today. He's a handful. He makes me want to smack myself on occasion. But he's also this beautiful, soulful person and I missed him as he walked away. I wanted to cry. (Okay, I've wanted to cry about a lot of things lately) And what I realized is that even though I'm not ready right this minute to get pregnant, I don't want to give up yet. So I have a plan.

 

I'm going to eat healthy. I'm going to get in shape again so I can be at optimal health. I'm going to work really hard so we can get a car big enough to fit four kids into, plus my husband and I. I'm going to practice every day being kind so that I will be kinder to my children (and my husband). I will stare at myself every day for a few seconds like this (but not in this good of shape, mind you)...

Though it's near it's end, I'm still going to promote this Kickstarter project, because I'd like to post it again. I'm not giving up yet, and I encourage all of you to endure for the good things. Someday, it will be worth all the sacrifice.

Not What I Want To Hear

It's funny...

Well, not really, but I was just thinking that sometimes I think we have to go through bad things just so we can learn to empathize with each other. That, and maybe there is some other vast and beyond-our-reach plan that I may never know about. You know and I know that most of us are probably living completely - or at least somewhat - different lives than we originally planned we would when we were daydreaming our way through Biology in high school. I thought I would have six kids, live near my parents and send my husband off to work everyday.

WRONG.
First of all, I will admit that I'm not unhappy with the way life turned out. So I live an hour away from my parents - it's not that far (but far enough). And I only have three kids, but it feels like six. And my husband works out of his studio attached to our house. Those aren't the kinds of surprises I was thinking about. More like, I didn't plan on miscarrying twice. I didn't plan on having to have surgery two years ago. I didn't plan on being so stretched and scrapped for time (my own time) that I am, undecidedly, a little jealous of a portion of my mother's life (about five years from the time I was 12 to 17) when she could sit on the couch and fold laundry and watch a show. But now she's more like me, stretched and scrapped for time. We are two busy mothers.

My body sometimes seems like it's out of my control. I can barely drag myself out of bed in the morning to exercise before the kids wake up. In fact, I'm pretty sure I snoozed, like, five times this morning. My teeth are falling apart. I'm hungry all the time, and frankly, I like to snack on chocolate chips and cold cereal (sometimes together - you should try it). My kids have superb amounts of homework that even I complain about, and I'm pretty sure it's because my mind is finally going. Going, going, gone.

My point is, we all have gone through something horrible (probably). It has created an empathy in me that I never knew or thought would exist. I've dealt with enough that I don't judge anymore. Are you one of those moms whose kid screams through your entire grocery store visit and the only way to shut him up is to buy him a cheese stick so you do? Me too. Does he eat half of it before you can pay for it? Me too. And that's when I'm thinking, "You know what would be funny? If I left my wallet in the car." Because I probably did. You too? Welcome to the club.

Thanks to AlysonWhitaker.BlogSpot.com for the pic.

When I hear women talk about their indecision about having children, about all the horrible things that come with it and that make things hard, trying to pro and con the whole situation, I feel them. If you don't want to have a child, that's your choice. If you want to have ten, that's your choice. What's important is that we're not pushing our decisions on each other. If I had ten kids? Well, that never would have happened, but I'm pretty sure I'd be institutionalized. If I have none? I would probably feel a little empty. But that's me. Not you.  And if you want to have kids and can't? I'm so sorry. I will never know how that feels. If you want to be a surrogate mother? That's amazing. I couldn't do it. I'm too selfish. Sorry. But I probably know some people who would. Totally tough women.

Again, I want to point to the Kickstarter program for the Immortality monument. This is important to me. It's what I want to share with the world, what I hope for it; that we can all become empathetic of each other, that we can understand each other, and that we can show the world that we are strong, courageous, and amazing. Visit and/or donate at https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/945510695/immortality.

The Immortality Monument

...And Why It's Important To Me

Promoting myself isn’t something that I’ve ever been comfortable doing, and even though this isn’t entirely about me, in a small way it is. I’m promoting something beautiful, thought provoking and life changing, and it has to do with all women.

 

Immortality is a statue that Michael Aaron Hall created while exploring the decisions women make regarding childbirth. This is a subject I feel strongly about, especially since I’ve experienced so many different emotions regarding pregnancy, childbirth, and loss.


Immortality, by Michael Aaron Hall

From everything I’d been told growing up, pregnancy was a magical feeling, wonderful and precious. I didn’t understand the dark side of pregnancy; the throwing up, the constant ache, and the incredible depression you may get postpartum.

At eight and a half months pregnant I was swollen and huge and I didn’t feel pretty at all. I had morning sickness with all five of my pregnancies, one so bad that I had to go to the hospital to be re-hydrated. My last pregnancy was uncomfortable almost all of the time. I felt ugly and enormous, and yet, I don’t really want to be finished. I would like another child. I’m on the fence.

 

Immortality, patina work at foundry

I lost two pregnancies between my second and third child. It was hard. It was difficult. And for one of them I wasn’t at home when it happened. I felt alone and so unexpectedly sad that I was afraid for myself. I didn’t think my odds of miscarriage were very good since my own mother never had one, but I dealt with two of them. Do you really think I was ready to jump into pregnancy again after miscarrying a second time?

Art was one of the best therapies I had. I’m lucky to be married to an artist. I would sit and watch my husband create these beautiful figures, and somehow that helped me get through my grief. It gave me hope for myself and others, and I want to share the empathy and compassion this sculpture has to offer.


Immortality in clay

What are we, as women, facing in today’s pressured world? Do we have time for children? Will we be able tot adopt if we want to? Are we going to be able to support them once they get here? There are so many factors now, things I never thought about or took into consideration before getting pregnant with my first child. And although things usually seem to work out in the end, there’s always that nagging fear that they won’t.

There are different reasons we want or don’t want to have children. I have a strong relationship with my husband, and I know that when we have a child that we are both in it together. We know what it takes – the restless nights, the constant diaper changes, and the sacrifice of most of our free time. We may not understand what others are going through in their lives and circumstances, but this is our opportunity to try.




Immortality, close up view

Immortality will be a life-size sculpture in bronze. The first step in this process is to get the piece created. We are looking at several different places that would be a possible home for the sculpture. Personally I would like to see it at a hospital or women’s center. If you have any thoughts or ideas about the statue itself or where you would like to see something like this located, share them with us.

Thank you for stopping by and reading, and if you feel as impassioned by this as I do, feel free to share our link at Kickstarter (https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/945510695/immortality).